Paris, 2024 Olympics host: “Pay attention, THIS is how you do an opening ceremony.”
Los Angeles, 2028 host: “Hold my chardonnay.”
There was a lot of fallout from the Olympics opening ceremonies in Paris, which were big and splashy and daring (one view) or overbearing, sacrilegious and, you know, just plain Frenchy (another view).
The athlete parade was on boats along the river Seine, which over there is pronounced sin, for whatever that’s worth. In the fishing world, seine is a huge net and pronounced sane, but it wouldn't be sane to dip a seine in the Seine, because you might pull up an unfortunate species of crappie.
Where were we?
GREAT AMERICAN BOOKCelebrate a fast-paced history of the Daytona 500 with new book; foreword by Richard Petty
The White House was represented at the opening ceremonies by future former first lady Jill Biden, whose quoted reaction was appropriate for any guest dignitary from another country, but might also fall into the infamous category of Things Better Left Unsaid.
Said Jill: “Every step of the way, I was thinking to myself, ‘how are we going to top this?’”
As if that wasn’t enough of a challenge to Los Angeles, she followed with this.
“OK, Paris has the Eiffel Tower, but we have Hollywood and the magic of Hollywood that makes all dreams come true.”
Can’t wait, right?
Hey, Willie!
(This email is in response to last week’s critically acclaimed fishing roundup, which led with news of a new category of Florida largemouth bass — the “Florida Bass,” of all things.)
Pointy-heads never let well enough alone.
Years ago I worked in Fisheries for the forerunner of the present Florida Fish & Wildlife Commission. We had the Largemouth Bass (Micropterus salmoides) and the Florida Largemouth Bass (Micropterus salmoides floridanus) plus the Suwannee bass and a couple of other subspecies in certain Panhandle watersheds.
Question: Did the FWC put them all on one stringer, Micropterus nigricans? If so, this is weird science.
GENE
HEY, GENE!
Almost went “Hi Gene,” just to keep it clean, but I’m above dad jokes.
It’s best to just go with what the FWC suggested: The Florida bass is indeed a bit different (including bigger) than many other varieties caught in this area of the country, so why not create its own category?
But unless you own a white lab coat and microscope, you won’t know the difference between a Florida bass and any other largemouth caught around here.
I did read this, however, in “Field & Stream,” which might give a bit of explanation while also giving us some relief in knowing “Field & Stream” is still fielding and streaming:
“The changes will ultimately result in 35 new opportunities for anglers to register world records.”
An additional revenue stream, perhaps?
Remember rumors of Hooters' demise?
Maybe you’ve heard disturbing news recently about Hooters, the national chain known for its wings and … well …
There’s been some restaurant closures, and in a truly troubling sign, Hendrick Motorsports took the hoot-owl off Chase Elliott’s Chevrolet and ended their sponsorship agreement — lack of payment appeared to be the not-so-subtle explanation.
And now we hear about new Hooters openings. Where? Where else? The Villages. In fact, Hooters is planning to plant three restaurants in the Central Florida haven known for great lawns, tricked-out golf carts and sensible footwear.
Guess who’s complaining. Not the dudes, if your sample survey focuses on letters to the editor.
“I envision Hooters to attract more outsiders to our community. Not of the higher caliber of people,” one woman wrote.
Good point. Envision four-top tables with guys stopping in for beer and overpriced wings after a round of golf, getting their stories straight on why they’re gonna get home an hour later than originally planned. There goes the neighborhood.
Another letter writer suggests drinking problems will worsen.
“... The male customers will sit and drink longer periods of time just to get a glance at young busty boobs in their face and Daisy Duke shorts with their butt cheeks hanging out.”
If she’s trying to dissuade the old(ish) Villagers from supporting the establishment, she might want to try another angle. Also, technically, they’re not Daisy Dukes.
Or so I’m told.
Hey, Willie! Pocono memories abound
Thanks for the brief history of the Pocono race track (July 14). I, too, have a few memories of the race track.
In the early-’70s, my dad took me (age 12), my brother (13), and my sister (8), camping in a pop-up camper in the Pocono Mountains and to one of the earliest IndyCar races there. A year later, we went camping again, only this time to a NASCAR race. Three of my fondest memories:
1. The track is/was in the middle of the woods!
2. It's a long way away from the first and second turns down the backstretch to Turn 3 and the short chute. Those cars look SO SMALL from those seats.
3. My dad had an ice-cream maker and we had the best soft-cone vanilla ice cream I ever tasted.
BLAINE
HEY, BLAINE!
Never been to Pocono, but always think of an old press-box buffet conversation about the place.
Old colleague Larry Woody covered NASCAR for the Tennessean in Nashville and is what you’d call “sneaky funny.”
Pocono's NASCAR races used to be 500 miles and the regulars said it sometimes felt more like 5,000. After one such long afternoon, someone in the press-box suggested there’s one good aspect of such things: “I was able to get my quarterly taxes done.”
Replied Woody: “I taught myself to speak Chinese.”
Sweating through a black-bean burger
The International Olympic Committee and the Paris hosts aren’t reserving over-the-top practices for ceremonial purposes.
While watching athletes complete in outside temps of 90-plus, keep in mind the Olympic Village residences were built without air conditioning. Many countries have to supply their own portable AC units to keep cool.
Also, the dining halls are short on meat and high on plant-based foods.
Yep, it’s all about the carbon footprint, they say. Some call it practicing what you preach, while others call it virtue signaling of the highest order. Either way, four years hence, L.A. will call and raise, pushing in all of their chips made from recycled materials.
— Reach Ken Willis at ken.willis@news-jrnl.com
